Requiem for the Nearly Departed

I watched the Late Late Show last night.

Well – you never know what strange or startling things you might miss?

At the end of the first segment, which was so boring, I can’t even remember what it was about, Plank gave one of his witty little teasers -

‘I have something to tell you that will please a lot of people and disappoint some others.  Come back after the break.’

‘Good God! He’s quitting the show,’ I shouted in amazement.

‘Don’t be daft. He probably has some tatty prize to give away, or something.’  Herself isn’t Plank’s biggest fan.

When the show resumed after the break, he made his announcement – He is quitting the show.

Of course, I was devastated.

I shall really miss Plank.

I shall miss those classic moments, such as the time he kicked the toy up the arse on the Toy Show and made a little girl cry.  I shall miss those moments where the questions are so embarrassing that the victim interviewee squirms in their seat.  I shall miss his little witty comments.  I shall miss the cute way he tries to put on a different voice when he is phoning someone.

Plank then went on to interview some tart and asked her about her breast reduction operation.  It was patently obvious that she was annoyed at the question and didn’t want to talk about it, but Plank in his own inimitable style pursued the topic to a point where I thought she was going to run off screaming.  It was classic Plank.

Yes.  I’m going to miss him.

The Late Late Show will never be the same again.

Thank God.