Donnie Darko remembered

Director / Writer: Richard Kelly Cast: Jake Gyllenhaal (The gay cowboy that gave Heath Ledger AIDS and killed him) Maggie Gyllenhall (The hot sister. The. Hot. Sister.) Patrick Swayze (Back from bothering Whoopi Goldberg from the dead and reincarnated as a kiddie fiddler) Some other people Story: Time travel without a DeLorean. Donnie knows the secrets of time travel but everyone thinks he’s crazy so he gets sent to therapy where he masturbates in the office. We find out why Harvey was invisible all those years ago. Mother nature sat on his face and hatched out an ugmeister. Veriew: A Jumbo jet engines falling through the sky and distracting me from Donnie’s hot sister while Donnie is in therapy for burning things that the weird ugly rabbit told him to do and he does all of them because he thinks he can travel through time and just when he thinks … There’s more

Movie News 07/04/09

Jennifer Garner and Butter. No, not as exciting as you might think, but mildly interesting all the same - she’s starring in a political satire which follows a young orphan adopted by a couple in the American Midwest who discovers she has a hidden talent. She’s a genius at carving sculptures from butter and must compete with the wife of her town’s former carving champion in the annual competition. According to the writer, Jason Micallef, he “wanted to do a political satire and…was looking for some venue that people take very seriously but is also ridiculous - like politics - but at the same time is really visual.” JJ Abrahms’ new comedy (he produces, while Roger Michell directs) has an impressive cast list. Morning Glory has Jeff Goldblum as the boss of an aspiring news producer, Rachel McAdams, who must save a failing morning TV show by keeping in check … There’s more